Friday, March 26, 2010
Shattered ~ My journey in pictures
I was so excited! I found out I was pregnant with our fourth child on my third son's birthday (July 2, 2009)
I put together a little "gift" for my husband ~ two newborn cloth diapers, the positive pregnancy test and I stamped a little tag with the exciting news on it.
On August 21, 2009 I had an ultrasound (I was over 13 weeks pregnant) that showed a happy, active baby with a heartbeat of 182 bpm.
September 11, 2009 (which is my dad's birthday) when I got home from my oldest two sons' soccer game I discovered blood.
September 12, 2009 I gave birth, at home, to a perfectly formed tiny 16 week gestation baby. Who knew you could lose a baby after the first trimester? I thought I was "safe" once we hit 13 weeks ~ we told everyone I was pregnant.....
I am a babyloss mama, an angel mommy ~ I will never be the same and I will never not hurt. My heart has been forever broken, unable to be "fixed" ~ I will always have a scar even if my heart does heal.
No mother should ever have *this* kind of ornament hanging on her Christmas tree...Baby's first Christmas ~ yes! Merry Christmas from Heaven ~ No!
I am hoping that one day out of MY ashes beauty will rise.
Posted by Lindsy at 7:09 AM